Bal Thackrey had asked West Indies to either declare or get bowled out early on the fifth day, else he will not let them play in Mumbai in the future. Now Raj Thackrey has asked Sachin to respect Marathi Maanush and score his 100th century at Mumbai in the 3rd test or else they will declare his famed signature "knee flex maneuver" lewd, and will dig his garden in protest. If he indeed does, Digvijay Singh will say "I see an RSS or Shiv Sena hand in this century" and "this is their Plan D after Baba Ramdev, Anna Hazare and Shri Shri Ravishankar". Mamata will demand a roll back since Sachin denied Kolkata of the opportunity in the 2nd test. Then she will strike a deal for a compensation package where in Sachin will have to play his 200th test in Kolkata. Laloo will ask everybody to declare this century null and void to defeat the communal forces.
Narendra Modi will offer a business development subsidy of 24 runs if Sachin agrees to "set up" his century in Ahmedabad. He will market it as the "Vibrant Gujarat cricket conclave". Nitish Kumar will say that such a feat if completed in Ahmedabad will lack inclusiveness.
Advani will start a Rath Yatra to tell the people how the foundation for this milestone was laid during the NDA regime; and how UPA had stalled Sachin on 99 centuries, just like they have stalled aam aadmi's progress. Manmohan Singh will request Advani to not state the "harsh" reality, and will again go mum. A reporter from the Tabloid Originating in India (TOI) will hear MMS muttering "coalition dharma".
Owing to the dubious nature of the leg before dismissal of Sachin in Kotla test, people will demand to bring Umpires under the ambit of Lokpal. Salman Khursheed will say that umpires need not be brought under Lokpal as the government is planning to bring the "Umpiring Accountability Bill" in the next session. Rahul Gandhi will take a cheating chit out of his pocket and cram two words. He will then ask for special intervention during the presentation ceremony through Ravi Uncle (Ravi Shastri) and will declare that - Umpiring Accountability Commission should be made a "Constitutional Body".
Human rights organizations will campaign against Devendra Bishoo who got Sachin out at Delhi and denied him the right to his 100th century. Arundhati Roy will lead a protest against BCCI for not hosting tests in naxal hit Jharkhand. Sheila Dikshit will blame the curator of Kota pitch which comes under the Delhi District Cricket association headed by Arun Jaitely. Arun Jaitely will put the blame on Sharad Pawar who heads the International Cricket Council and is an alliance partner with the UPA.
Meanwhile a Pranab Mukherjee note will surface through RTI, indicting P Chidambaram of conspiring with A Raja to stop Sachin's century at Kotla to earn money from bookmakers. Congress will rope in Kapil Sibbal to diffuse the crisis, who will prove that the 100th 100 is only a "notional" milestone!
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